A very special day...

Today (Sunday February 28, 2010) is a very special day.

It’s is not my birthday, nor is it an anniversary, or an outing to a place/event.

Today is my last day being a smoker!!!

For the past 10 years I have been a smoker.

I did not choose to be a smoker…. no smoker does. Yes, as a teenager I did choose to take those first experimental puffs. But no smoker can remember the day when he/she says to them self: “I am going to be a smoker. I am going to spend money everyday to buy these things, and do this day in and day out for the rest of my life’

Smoking lured me in like it does with most people. How did it do so? It wasn’t because it tasted good… but because it tasted awful. When I tried smoking for the first time it tasted like shit, and because of that I thought: “Good… I don’t enjoy this, so I can just keep doing it when I am around my buddies and quit whenever I want” But this is was not the case as the most addictive drug known to man: Nicotine was being put in to my body. Before I realized it, I was hooked. Very similar to heroin, smoking is a drug addiction, and a trap.

I have…

• Been forced to go out in to the cold everyday during breaks.
• Stunk up my car.
• Spent more money then I’d like to admit.
• Had a dentist ask me if I smoked, because my teeth were stained.
• Left my girlfriend in bed numerous times… to go outside and smoke.
• Brushed my teeth several times in a day to get rid of the bad breath.
• Felt like an outcast. Often being ‘the only one who smokes’
• Breathed very heavily after taking a simple set of stairs.
• Suffered chest pains, lack of energy, and poor eating habits because cigarette’s are a hunger suppressant.
• Made excuse after excuse to keep smoking… that it has somehow… helped me get through stressful times, and that it is never the right time to quit.
• Became aggravated during movies, band practices, family gatherings, and other social occasions because I was unable to smoke when I wanted.
• Made dozens of attempts to stop only to give in during an inebriated moment.

I have given this a great deal of thought, and the only reason why I smoke is to get rid of the withdrawal symptoms…. then I don’t smoke for awhile… then the withdrawal symptoms reappear… so I smoke again to get rid of them… and that chain has been going on for the past 10 years. All I am really doing is repeatedly trying to get back to the state that every nonsmoker already enjoys. What is the sense in this? There is none. I have been tricked… I have fallen in to the most sinister trap that man and nature have ever combined together… I have been a complete idiot.

Tonight I put out my final cigarette, and tomorrow will enjoy my first day as a HAPPY nonsmoker.Yes, I wrote HAPPY. In previous attempts to stop I would always warn friends that I am ‘trying’ to stop, and to avoid me for the next few weeks as I will be going through withdrawal, and be grumpy. These were futile attempts right from the beginning.

As I sit here writing this, I am already thinking: ‘This is wonderful!!! THIS IS SO FUCKING WONDERFUL!!! I don’t have to smoke anymore!!! I don’t have to stick these things in my mouth anymore and suffocate myself, pay $9.00 a pack, and be constantly be planning out my day… where I will be able to smoke, and where I won’t be. I WILL BE FREE FROM THIS SLAVERY!!!

I suck at writing. But I am pretty excited, and wanted to share.